The Best Strategies Against Verbal Abuse

I was researching the topic of verbal abuse as it unfortunately occurs quite a lot in the city where I live. The other day as I was bicycling one motorist randomly started spewing at me about a helmet – something I consciously choose not to wear. Irregardless, a passing motorist has no business whatsoever shouting out their window to a bicyclist about whether they’re wearing a helmet or not.

In fact it is unsafe to do so and it should be illegal. A bicyclist should not be distracted by motorists.

When I heard the person spewing at me I initially did what I almost always do in such situations: nothing. I did not respond. I did not acknowledge the person. I did not react to them. That is usually the most empowering thing one can do because not giving an abuser attention immediately cuts them off.

But as I was stopped at a red light and the spewing motorist was next to me and did not stop spewing, I briefly turned and spoke to them, in a calm, unhurried manner “Stop killing the Earth”.

When the light turned green I proceeded on my way and as the motorist accelerated away she shouted out her window a loud “Fuck you” at me which showed her real intent. Her shouting about my not having a helmet was really just a pretense to start harassing me.

People are demonic, and there is a lot of demonic energy that floats around. There are a lot of sick and highly unstable people waiting to go off on anyone in their immediate surrounding who they can victimize. A person on a bicycle – much more vulnerable than motorists in other vehicles – is a perfect target, a perfect victim.

I cannot count how many times as a bicyclist I’ve been subjected to random verbal abuse. We like to believe we live in a civil society where there are things like common respect, integrity, and basic levels of decency but that is not true. Behind the thin facade of decency and integrity is massive abusiveness and violence that comes from mental instability which is rampant in this society.

To me the Abu Ghraib atrocities committed by the US military against imprisoned Iraqis was not at all surprising. The subconscious currency that is spoken in America is that of abuse and power.

People want to take out, to lash out at others, their dark energy and when contexts allow it to occur, when there is an easy victim, it happens. What happened at Abu Ghraib was just that there was an easy opportunity to victimize the vulnerable, an opportunity which had been condoned if not explicitly encouraged and cultivated at the highest levels.

Anyone who has seen footage of other atrocities such as the US military’s helicopter attack against unarmed civilians, including a journalist, in Iraq that was released via Wikileaks is witnessing the same thing. Much of the methodical mistreatment, abuse, and killing from military activities is abuse at the highest levels, resulting in maiming and death in many cases.

Its important to understand that all abuse goes together. When there are some types of abuse going on in a society it is much easier for other forms to occur as well. Everything feeds into everything else.

This is why its so important to recognize and understand abuse, and to stand up firmly against whenever possible. Even small abuses which start to seem ordinary and become considered part of the status quo are bad. Small abuses lead to bigger and bigger ones. If a society is going to claim that it is tolerant of some lesser ones but not accept larger ones, where is the line going to be drawn? Who is going to say “This abuse is acceptable, but this abuse is not”? All abuse is fundamentally wrong, by definition.

Doing research online I found an interesting article entitled The Best Strategies Against Verbal Abuse.

Whether the ambush comes from someone plagued with jealousy, a social anxiety disorder, or an inferiority complex, you owe it to yourself to neutralize—and not internalize—the verbal attack. Here are a few strategies that are sure to stop that verbal bully in his tracks.

see the full article at the link above.

Sitting here thinking about some of the verbal abuse that’s happened recently, it makes me remember that words are only sounds. While it may be unpleasant to have someone deliberately annoying or insulting you, in the end you are that much the greater if you can just walk away and forget. Because where is the harm? Words are only sounds. The people who are caught up in spewing ugliness onto others are the ones trapped.

In the end its best to just walk free of the traps. Then just leave the abusers to suffer in their own misery.